Monday, December 31, 2012

Brain Puke IX (Happy New Year Edition)

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain. Let's capture some of it here.

So Kim "Kash Kow" Kardashian is preggers; who gives a fuck?  Only her mama and her baby daddy, who are now putting their heads together to milk (see what I did there?  milk?) corporations for freebies.  Oh yeah, and she's STILL MARRIED!

So Jessica Simpson is preggers AGAIN; who gives a fuck?  Moooooooooooooo!  She gonna get fat so Weight Watchers can suck her dry again. Oh yeah, and she's STILL NOT MARRIED!

So someone (his father, it seems) claimed the body of Adam Lanza, the CT school shooter.  Dump it in the swamps of FL and let the alligators have at it.  Nobody gives a shit about this piece of shit anyway.

So they fired our useless football coach today.  Good riddance to him and his fucked-up family.

"Here we go over the fiscal cliff, the fiscal cliff, the fiscal cliff, here we go over the fiscal cliff, ay yi yi...(splat)"

I hate our partisan federal/state/local goverments.  I try and vote the asshats out, but other assholes keep voting FOR the asshats!  I can't win! :(

WHY THE FUCK am I even at work today?  There's NOTHING to do!

Tomorrow spouse and I will have pork and sauerkraut (he's german) and xmess pudding and marzipan (I'm british and austrian) for our main meal.

Tonight we will stay home and drink and probably be in bed by 9p.  Oy, such an exciting life we lead!

"Spo-a-rama-lama-ding-dong" in DE in less than 90 days! :)

Baseball season starts in less than 50 days!!!!!  GO PHILLIES!!!!! :)

I just picked up a new follower today (John Gray)!  YAYZ for more boyfriends! :)

Sean and Bob are my 2 biggest referral sites (in that order) - YAYZ! :)

Hey, Torii Hunter: STFU!  NOW!

Hey, Charlie Sheen: STFU!  NOW!

HAPPY 2013 TO ALL MY BOYFRIENDS! :)

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!





This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Let It Whip" - yes please! :)

Sharing the Season (Part 3)

While not as flashy as Mangina's gift, I can challenge my inner Martha Stewart with these prezzies.







Spouse chose well.  Anyone jealous yet? :-b

It's not that I didn't already HAVE these items, but I wanted an extra set of measuring spoons/cups.  And I burned out the motor of a hand mixer years ago (why yes, I WAS using the mixer for its intended purpose; get yer naughty minds outta da guttah!), so this is a replacement.  For most recipes, I will still mix by hand; no electricity needed!

I also received a book 13 years in the making!  Signed by the author too!



Spouse volunteers at the Stoogeum, and the author also is a partner in keeping the museum running.  It's a "then and now" book.  Some good reading for me!

Hope all my boyfriends had a good holiday! :)

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Sharing the Season (Part 2)




From the bestest tv show EVAH!

Spouse and I actually saw these hand-knit sweaters at the MST3K studios in 1993 during a tour of the facility in Eden Prairie, MN.

Hope all my boyfriends have a great day, whatever you choose to do! :)

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Sharing the Season

I finally got the giftmas tree decorated today.  I also did laundry and fixed the upstairs toilet and went to the gym.  But that's not why I am here.

I thought I would share some of my tree ornaments with my boyfriends, since all y'all are so damn far away.

First up:



My ceramic yellow submarine; I'mma looking for blue meanies (or redumblicans) to conquer.

Next:



Beavis and Butthead.  Because I am 12.  Nyah nyah nyah!

Next:



A cousin of mine made this about 50 years ago; she made from an egg shell and added beads and ribbon and the lil angel.

Next:



This is a painted crab shell I bought in Baltimore MD last year.  It is the logo of my baseball team, the Philadelphia Phillies.  Less than 60 days til baseball season starts!

Finally:



The first ornament spouse and I bought; it says "Our First Christmas Together, 1991".

Certainly not a traditional tree, by any stretch of the imagination.

I leave you with this image:



I figured sassybear would like this one!

HAVE A VERY BEARY GIFTMAS! :-)

Saturday Night Dance Party!



This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Be My Lover" - would you please? :)

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Winter Vacation (via Jeep Guy)

Sean posts one of these here TMI's every week.  So I'mma gonna post MY answers right here.

1. What is your favorite winter clothing item or outfit? my purple gloves
 
2. Do you have plans for a winter vacation? When and where? no

 
3. Do you have a climate preference? I'd like 70 degrees and dry all year round please

 
4. What do you like to do on your winter vacations? since I don't take one, it's a moot point

 
5. Do you unpack your suitcase or live out of it? Are there any items you never unpack? unpack if longer than 2 days; no to part 2

 
6. Essentials for an extra "fun" weekend? Would you take them through airport security? laptop for free porn; I don't fly

Last, Best, Worst or most fun vacation sex. Details. Details, Details. I respectfully take the 5th amendment as the evidence may incriminate me.

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Brain Puke VIII

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain.  Let's capture some of it here.


Xmess tree with bow and lights and skirt on sunporch.  No ornaments yet; possibly tomorrow (nope, it didn't happen; tree is still nekkid).

 

Candles in the window.

 

I wanna take every fucking gun in this country (except from the police) and melt them down and turn the metal into sculptures!  Fuck that fucking CT asshole shit-for-brains muthafucker! 

Mike Huckabee and Victoria Jackson and Bill Bennett and the Westboro Baptist Church: shut your fucking pie-holes RIGHT FUCKING NOW! 


Pope Benedict: shut your fucking pie-hole RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
  

I gotta prezzie in the mail today allllll the way from New Zealand!  From my friend and fellow knitter Kiwi James!


  

The stocking has some Australian and New Zealand chocolate inside...


My company holiday party was this past Wednesday; beer and booze and ribs!  Of course, we had to go back to work afterwards...I hoisted a cosmo in honor of all my boyfriends!

Too much stress and too few hours in the day make me very tense indeed! :(


Saturday Night Dance Party!



This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"I Can't Go For That" -I can't go for guns, no no, no can do; "where do you stop, where do you dare me to draw the line?"  YO, GIVE IT UP FOR MAH PHILLY BOYZ!

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The (totally made up by Faux Snooze) War on Xmess

Sean posts one of these here TMI's every week.  So I'mma gonna post MY answers right here.

1. Which religion or faith do you belong to, if any? - none; organized religion is for sheeple

2. What is your opinion of seasonal greetings and salutations? - "happy holidays" and "happy new year" works just fine for everyone

3. Holiday music on the radio? - FUCK NO!  UGH!

4. What is your policy for exchanging gifts? - set spending limit for each person (in my case, spouse, sister, niece, nephew-in-law).  pay in cash = no bills after shitmas is over.

5. Gift cards are... - fucking KEWL!

6. Christmas cards/family update letters are... - non-religious cards are fine; update letters should be burned and pissed on!

7. Snow is... - a huge pain in the ass!

8. Have you been a good little boy or girl? - FUCK YEAH!  ALWAYS! :-)

9. RAPID FIRE FAVORITES:

     1. Food - italian pizzelle cookies (licorice flavored ONLY)

     2. Dessert - english xmess pudding

     3. Song - "happy xmas war is over"

     4. Movie - "scrooge" (1951 b/w alastair sim version ONLY)

     5. Tradition - japanese or thai food on xmess day

BONUS
Christmas sex: What have you done under the mistletoe? Have you caught daddy kissing Santa Clause? Have you done it a santa suit? Did you come down the chimney? Just how merry have you made Santa's helpers? - NO to all of this!  But I'd like to watch one of my boyfriends do Santa!

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!




This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"In My House" - high class whorehouse!   Certainly NOT my house! :)

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Brain Puke VII

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain.  Let's capture some of it here.

My first holiday card was from ron!

Today was a shitclusterfuck at work; my co-irkers would NOT STFU!!

Tonight was chest and back day at the gym; uff da!

My egg donor turns 80 today; meh.

So I went to spouse's holiday party on saturday. OMFB; get this:
  • many of the women were dressed either like whores or hoochie mamas.
  • some of these women were ready to pop out their tops or their bottoms or both.  waaaay too much skin on display.
  • I DID see some cute looking BILFs (boyz I'd like to fuck).
  • someone brought 2 bratleys - one was about 2 and the other was about 6 months. they are the grandkids of the company founder. INAPPROPRIATE!
  • the party opened up with someone singing the national anthem. at a holiday party. REALLY?
  • “santa claus” was introduced to us. REALLY? at an all adult party?
  • “happy birthday” was sung for the company. REALLY? at a holiday party?
  • the band was too fucking LOUD; they gave me a pounding headache.
  • best part of the food - crab-stuffed shrimp. and chicken parm.
  • funniest moment - during bar set-up, someone dropped a tray of glasses. broke every dammed one of them. I cheered.
  • so I got a free drink (gin n tonic), a free glass of wine (merlot), and some free food. I could have done without the free floor show.
I just got $200 back from my mortgage escrow account; can you say holiday shopping time?  I knew you could!

Today, the temperature in the greater Philly are was 68 degrees F.  I wish it would stay that way allllllll winter long!

Last weekend, I put my holiday electric candles in the windows.  I had to replace 6 burned out bulbs; thank dog spouse bought 2 packs of spares!

This weekend it's put up the 4' fake tree time, and hang the SIL-handmade stockings by the fireplace.

I guess I need to take pix of all this, right?

My company's holiday lunch is next wednesday.

There is not enough booze to get me through the next 4 weeks.

Spouse and I will probably have Japanese or Thai food for giftmas day, since we already had indian food for thanksgiving.

WTeverlovinF is with all the plastic crap inflatables on people's lawns?

Isn't it time to put the Valentine's Day candy out in the stores?

"All I want is what I've got coming to me.  All I want is my fair share." - Lucy Van Pelt

MY BOYFRIENDS ARE THE BEST IN THE WORLD!

The Spo Meme - Catch It!

To honor Dr. Spo, I proudly steal this meme.

(fill in the blank) is jolly good fun! - partying/eating/drinking/conversing with friends

Tea, Wine or Champagne?  wine - ecco domani pinot grigio, or verdi (sparkling italian spumanti), or kendall-jackson merlot

How Left Handed are you?  not; it just sits there, useless, unless I am lifting weights

The loudest piece of clothing I have is...a chartreuse long-sleeve t-shirt

The Best Friend, who is s/he? I don't have one

I'd rather eat rats in Tewkesbury than... eat vegetables


How many of these have you done?

1. Been to an Opera?  never; musical plays, but never opera

2. Read a novel by Dickens?  yes; "great expectations" (horrible rubbish), "a christmas carol" (love)

3. Drank Bourbon?  never (and never will)

4. Been to Key West?  never, but would like to

5. Visited the Stratford Festival of Canada?  never (though I have visited canada)

6. Spiders give you the heebie jeebies? no; the way they spin webs is fascinating!

7. Been to Michigan?  never (one of the 10 states I need to see)

8. Rolled down a grass hill?  yes (as a child)

9. Ate Synder Pretzels?  hell yeah; they ARE made in PA, ya know!

10. Used the word "rubbish" in the last 30 days?  see #2 (heh heh heh, #2)

11. Worn a bow tie?  no, but they sure look fetching on spo!

12. Have a set of Viking Horns?  no, just naturally horny  :-b

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!



This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Relax" - are you shitting me?  Who has time to relax?  I DON'T!

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

My Fave Movies - Holiday Time

I know that several of my boyfriends like movies; here are some holiday gems, cause, well, tis the season.

Comment away - which have you seen/not seen, liked/hated, good/bad memories, acting, good/bad jokes, etc.  I am interested in your thoughts.

(in no particular order, with my comments following)

Scrooge (1951 version) - there is NO other version of "A Christmas Carol" that comes close!  I feel it captures the Dickensian times perfectly.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas - Boris Karloff was wonderful.  The rest, not so much.

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer - I used to feel like a misfit toy...until I got therapy.

Frosty the Snowman - Happy Birthday!  Jimmy Durante!

Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol - the song "I'm All Alone in the World" always makes me cry.  Yes, another therapy issue for me.

A Charlie Brown Christmas - you got it, I am the unloved little tree; another therapy issue.  Anyone else sense a pattern here? :)

Elf - Zooey and Will singing "Baby It's Cold Outside".

Beavis and Butthead Christmas Special - huh huh huh.

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians - as captioned by Mystery Science Theater 3000.

Santa Claus - as captioned by Mystery Science Theater 3000.


Did I miss anything? I'm SURE you'll let me know!  Smooches! :)

PS - the first person that mentions "It's a Wonderful Life" or "The Christmas Story" gets a boot to the head; they both suck ass!  Ain't I a bitch?!?

Liar Liar Pants on Fire! (update)

I thought I would steal this from jim.

Here are 5 things about me; which one is the lie?

1.  I have a younger sister.

2.  I have quit jobs after only 3 weeks.

3.  I have only 7 years to go til retirement.

4.  I like my job.

5.  I love indian food.

Place your bets, folks; but my pot is not worth $500 million. :)

**********

Well well well! ALL of you are WRONG!

I do have a younger sister; she is 5 years younger than I. We are on total opposite sides of the fence: she is religious and rethuglican, I am atheist and democrat. She had a child, I have never given birth. She puts up with my sperm & egg donors, I told them to fuck off in 1990. She is divorced and never re-married, I am divorced and re-married.

THE CORRECT ANSWER IS #3.

I will never retire; retirement is not a word in my vocabulary; my house is mortgaged until I am 85 (and I am currently 58). Yeah, you see where this is going. Also, I cannot just sit and do nothing.

Thanks for playing along; I will do this again soon! :)

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Erik's Meme (from a girl's point of view)

I thought I would steal this from cubby.

Is your beard as soft as it looks? Is it due to constant maintenance, or is it naturally that way?

no beard (on a girl?)

Does your area have a food or dish that it’s known for? Something that was invented there or that just isn’t the same anywhere else?

cheesesteaks, soft pretzels, scrapple, tastykakes, goldenberg's peanut chews candy, bassett's ice cream, zitner's easter eggs 

Do you follow any webcomics?

no 

If money were not necessary, how would you spend your days? Where would you go to do it?

travel, volunteering (my, this requires thought; I've worked since I was 16)

Would you ever consider visiting Canada… as in Vancouver Island?

the whole of canada deserves exploration!

Are you a musician? Do you/have you ever played an instrument or sang, have you ever written a song?

used to play piano (not well); I still sing (not well)

Do you swim? Was Jacques Yves Cousteau ever a figure of legend for you?

nope; I have a fear of water

Have you ever done drag? Do you ever *want* to do drag?

no and no

Have you always wanted to be a man? Ever wanted to be a woman?

no; I was born this way hey!

How did you meet your husband? Where, when and what did you do on your first date?

a personal ad in a free weekly paper.  first date was to a music concert at a local club.

Have you ever had a cross-generational relationship?

no 

How do you wipe your ass?

like everyone else

What is the worst thing you have ever done?

I never spoke up about the abuse I suffered as a child/adult; too late now since no one would believe me.

When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? How did those dreams change as you aged?

I wanted to be a paralegal.  I NEVER wanted to be a nurse/teacher/mother/nun (stupid catholic school education).  I am currently an office manager for a small manufacturing company; clerical work and I are a perfect fit.  the attention to detail and organizational abilities are in line with my zodiac sign (virgo).

What are you longing for?

something that doesn't exist; a utopia where I make all the rules 

What are your small and large passions, the things that move you at a very deep level? Poetry? Sunrises? Sunsets? Kittens? The bite of the tattoo needle into virgin skin for the first time? Other?

books, music, knitting, baseball, cats, train travel

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!




This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"The Sign" - as in $$$$; greed pigs demand you "shop til you drop" for shitmas crap.

NOT ME, BAYBEE!  I've opened up my eyes!

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Key Lime Pie (for Bob)


Since Bob said he loves key lime pie (see my last post), I thought I would put the recipe here so that he can make it for himself (and Carlos) by himself!

ingredients:

1 - 9 inch graham cracker pie shell (I cheat here and buy this premade at the grocery store)

1 - 14 ounce can SWEETENED condensed milk (NOT evaporated milk)

3 - egg yolks (yolks only, no whites)

1/2 cup - key lime juice (found in the baking needs aisle) key lime juice linky luv

assembly:

blend milk, egg yolks, key lime juice until smooth

pour into graham cracker crust

bake for 15 minutes at 350 degrees F

garnish with whipped creme (optional)

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Brain Puke VI

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain.  Let's capture some of it here.

Next weekend is a 4 day weekend for me.  Suck it, h8ers!

I hate, detest, despise turkey and ham and every other holiday meal offering described as "the best feast ever"!  Gimme chicken tikka masala with roti and jasmine rice; that's MY idea of a feast!

It was a clusterfuck week at work; next week (3 days) promises to be more of the same.  FML

Please send your healing thoughts/good karma to 2 of my boyfriends who are both undergoing a serious health crisis right now: Saint Lewis and Blair.

My spouse's BFF is paying me to knit him a poncho! :)

I like the way my homemade key lime pies with whipped creme stars turn out.

I am insanely jealous of Shawn from San Diego; he is meeting the great Dr. Spo today in Palm Springs CA!

It's 53 degrees and sunny today; it IS November, right?

I dug out the holiday cards last evening.

WTF? I go to the grocery store after the gym this morning, and the shelves are damn near bare.  Mind, it's Aldi's, so the selection is small to start.  NO FUCKING CANNED SHROOMS!  But I did get everything else I wanted, and spent only $99.

So the GOP can't figure out why Mittens lost.  I'll tell you why: the GOP is comprised of WASP str8 old MEN!  Guess they never heard of women, gays, ethnic people, young people.  And what a bunch of wining crybaby sore losers too!  The best candidate won the job - get the fuck over it!  And maybe they should figure out how to recognize the 47% of us; nah, that will NEVER happen!  Bill (traditional america) O'Reilly can suck mah balls!

Hey, dude in the flag sweatshirt with your 3 out of control crotchfruit in the grocery store: next time, leave the animals at home, mmmkay?  they were old enough (read: over 5 years old) to know how to behave.  Y U NO make them use their indoor voices?  Y U NO tell them not to run?  Y U NO teach them self-control?  Get out the ball gags and leashes!

I have taken to listening to the classical radio station at work.  Why?  NO FUCKING STUPID HOLIDAY COMMERCIALS!  Talk about assault and battery!

Hey, fellow co-irker, your kids are adults now.  Y U still want to run their lives AND get pissed off when they don't follow your "helpful suggestions"?  My egg donor was the same way...until I cut her off 24 years ago!  Fuck that noise!

18 months later, and I still enjoy going to the gym 3x/week.

Baseball season begins again in less then 90 days!  Y U NO come faster?

The laundry and vacuuming ain't gonna do themselves...guess I gotta get off my fat ass and go do the chores!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL MY BOYFRIENDS!  I am grateful you are part of my life! Smooches! :)

Saturday Night Dance Party!




This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Rock Steady" - yeah man!  Move those hips!  Shake that ass!

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!

 




This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Celebrate"- because Obama won another term (suck it, redumblicans!) and because it's Ron's birthday!  WOO HOO!

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Brain Puke V

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain.  Let's capture some of it here.

Hurricane Sandy really put a hex on the east coast; my house escaped damage, but others...OMFB.  As of yesterday, my boss still did not have electricity/phone/cable/internet.  In speaking with someone in NY yesterday, she told me that a co-worker's house on Long Island was washed away; all that co-worker had was the clothes on her back.  And you think YOU have it rough!

I give thanks that all my DE boyfriends are safe after Sandy.  And now we know that sean is safe too!

Political ads everywhere I turn this weekend: tv, radio, newspaper, even the fucking websites I visit.  ENOUGH ALREADY!

Hey, bitch in the grocery store, ya think you could stop yabbing on your phone long enough to load the conveyor belt, pack your bags, and put said bags into your car?  AND your conversations were not in the least bit interesting; every fucking aisle I visited, there you were.  STFU already!

To all those people who bought up all the milk/bread/eggs, then lost electricity and the food spoiled, FUCK YOU for wasting food!

NJ gov Christie sucking up to Obama; I thought I had seen everything up to that point.  Oh yeah, Christie, rail against the man until last week, then suck his dick dry for federal disaster money.  Backstabber!

I think I overdid the leg exercises at the gym Thursday night; my knees and thigh muscles are still sore.

To paraphrase a song, "it's the crap, crappiest season of all".  I am starting to see more xmoose shit in the stores/ads/newspapers.  Makes me wanna rent a flamethrower!

I hate turkey, stuffing, green bean casserole.  I think holiday dinners should be grilled salmon, or curry chicken tikka masala, or lasagna, or teriyake pork roast.

I ain't a-buying many gifts this holiday season cause I don't have the cash.  Don't like what I give you as a gift?  Fuck you!  You're lucky if I give you anything at all!

Why no, I DON'T wanna hold your bratley or look at pictures of your derpina potty-training.  Get a fucking life; the whole world does NOT revolve around your crotchdropping.

My Fave Movies - Comedies (Part Deux)

I know that several of my boyfriends like comedy; hell, they think I should be a stand-up comedian myself!  Several of these movies have some great belly-shaking laugh lines.

So comment away - which have you seen/not seen, liked/hated, good/bad memories, acting, good/bad jokes, etc.  I am interested in your thoughts.

(in no particular order, with my comments following)


Young Frankenstein - "it's pronounced 'eye gore'"; "sed-a-give?"; "roll, roll, roll in the hay!"


Life of Brian - "blessed are the cheesemakers?"; Graham Chapman full monty shot (woo hoo!)


Caddyshack - "did somebody sit on a duck?"; baby ruth bar in the pool; "I'm all right, no body worry about me"


Groundhog Day - "I got you, babe"; IT'S GROUNDHOG DAY!; 19th century French poetry


Napoleon Dynamite - vote for Pedro!; "numchuck skillz, computer hacking skillz"; rex kwan do; uncle rico; "I caught you a delicious bass"


A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum - "tragedy tomorrow, comedy tonight!"


Pee Wee's Big Adventure - "I'm a loner, Dottie, a rebel"; "the Alamo doesn't have a basement!"; how I wanted that sweet bike


Mr. Bean's Holiday - Wordless Rowan Atkinson in a sweet comedy


Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle - Neil Patrick Harris wishing for pooty-tang?  yeah, riiiiiiiight!  ;-)


Did I miss anything? I'm SURE you'll let me know!  Smooches! :)

Saturday Night Dance Party!




This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Everybody Wants To Rule The World" - for my USA boyfriends, 11/6 is VOTE DAY; vote as if your very life depends on it, BECAUSE IT DOES!  Just say NO to Mittens; we DON'T want him ruling our world!

For my non-USA boyfriends, bet you can't wait til this election shit is over; well, neither can we!

OBAMA/BIDEN 2012!  FORWARD!

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!



This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Everybody" - in honor of dr. spo's fave holiday!

Friday, October 26, 2012

Sandy - Part Deux

Since Kelly started it, I'mma gonna one-up him with a local dude.

I am in a wait-n-see mode about this possible storm.

Smooches to all, especially my boyfriends along the eastern seaboard.




Saturday, October 20, 2012

Brain Puke IV

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain.  Let's capture some of it here.






The object underneath the bird feeder is the white squirrel; janey so nicely asked for a picture.  It was a rainy day, and I didn't want to disturb the little rodent.  Perhaps it will bring us luck, as dr. spo commented.

I AM FUCKING SICK AND TIRED OF ELECTION SHIT!

Spouse and I took a vacation from work last week.  Where did we go and what did we do?  NOWHERE AND NOTHING!  The both of us were sick; me with a head cold and him with sinusitis that required a DR visit and a medication.  What a waste!

10/15 was spouse's birthday (age 53); 10/17 was our 20th anniversary.

Tomorrow spouse and I are going to visit my niece and nephew-in-law.  I owe them a wedding present; they were married on 7/16/11.  I hand-knit them a 5' x 5' blanket.  I started it on 9/19/10, and finished it on 5/22/12.  A work of art, I tells ya!

My sister will also be visiting her daughter and son-in-law at the same time.  The two of us may be sisters, but we are so VERY different.  Put a religious rethuglican and an atheist democrat in the same room and watch the sparks fly!

It gets dark at 6:30p now; it sux!

I am starting to see more red and yellow and gold and orange trees.  It has been a bit chilly at night, so perhaps that has hastened the leaf color change.  Spouse will pick the last of his peppers and tomatoes tomorrow.  The lawn has been cut for the final time.

The house smells of fresh baked bread!

The cats are digesting their dinner by sleeping it off on the sunporch.  Something like this scene:



Meredith is on the left, Nyla is on the right.

The dozen roses spouse got me for our anniversary sit on the hearth; gorgeous blossoms (whites and pinks)!

Time now for dinner and a small drinky-poo; after all, it IS Saturday night!  Smooches to all my boyfriends everywhere!

Saturday Night Dance Party!


This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Who Can It Be Now" - the dems? or the rethugs? STOP THE ROBOCALL INSANITY!

This video has sexy feet for sean and beary fur for ME! :)

Sunday, October 14, 2012

My Fave Movies - Comedies

I know that several of my boyfriends like comedy; hell, they think I should be a stand-up comedian myself!  Several of these movies have some great belly-shaking laugh lines.

So comment away - which have you seen/not seen, liked/hated, good/bad memories, acting, good/bad jokes, etc.  I am interested in your thoughts.

(in no particular order, with my comments following)

austin powers: international man of mystery - oh gah, the swinging 60s ("do I make you horny, baby?  randy?"); the sequels sucked ass

beavis and butthead do america - heh heh heh, I said "do"

send me no flowers - oh cripes, bet rock hudson and paul lynde had a gay old time making this one (wink wink nudge nudge); tony randall's deadpan lines

animal house - john belushi's best; "thank you sir, may I have another?" "was it over when the germans bombed pearl harbor?"; I cannot hear the song "louie louie" without thinking of this movie

planes trains and automobiles - john hughes directed; steve martin and john candy pairing up as road warriors; ray charles singing "mess around" ALWAYS gets me moving!

a shot in the dark - peter sellers' hairy chest! :)

the pink panther - suave david niven, silly peter sellers, the car chase scene; herbert lom, RIP

harold and maude - "if you wanna sing out, sing out..."

the odd couple - "hello, divorced broke and sloppy"; "now it's gahhhhhhhhbage"; the pigeon sisters

the producers - the original was FAR BETTER than the remake; "then get it, oh wicked witch of the west!"; "two three kick turn, turn turn kick turn"

joe's apartment - ants help a clueless dude find love

mannequin - MADE IN PHILADELPHIA (nuff said there); "nothing's gonna stop us now"; sorry, but the gay character was the too over the top stereotypical str8-guy-playing-gay = WRONG

my big fat greek wedding - egad, I have attended weddings like this and it seems all ethnic groups have da crazies

love at first bite - "I love the nightlife, I gotta boogie, on the disco round, oh yeah yeah yeah!"; arte johnson as renfield

blazing saddles - "confidentially, my grandmother was dutch"; "mongo straight!"; "but we don't want the irish, oh prairie shit, everybody!"; the bean scene

monty python and the holy grail - killer rabbits, the knights who say NI, the coconut shells, patsy the horse, "spamalot"; "go away or we shall taunt you a second time"

the trouble with angels - hayley mills post-disney movie; made in this area; "willows, willows!" (gypsy rose lee as a dance instructor)

some like it hot - "like jello on springs"; "nobody's perfect"; MARILYN!

Did I miss anything? I'm SURE you'll let me know!  Smooches! :)

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!




This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Shiny Happy People" - Rethuglicans?  Tea Party Sheeple? Or just the 47% (the rest of us)?

This version of the same song always makes me smile.




Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Who Wants Hot Muffins?

I just made a batch of lemon almond muffins; you should smell my kitchen! and fuck me but these are fantastic!

muffin mania (basic recipe)
2 cups flour
2 eggs
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/4 cup sugar
3/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup milk
1/2 cup oil (canola, olive, safflower, etc.)
1 oz extract (use the whole bottle) - see below
optional mix-ins - see ** below
  1. preheat oven to 400 degrees.

  2. dump all the ingredients into a bowl and mix well.

  3. spray a muffin pan with non-stick cooking spray or use paper cup liners; pour batter into pan/liners.

  4. bake for 18 minutes until a tester comes out clean. your oven, YMMV.

  5. let cool on rack.
try extracts like anise, rum, peppermint, maple, orange, banana, strawberry, vanilla, lemon.

** add nuts or poppy seeds or raisins or chocolate chips or coconut. add fruit. add spices like cinnamon or nutmeg or ginger. GO CRAZY!

My Fave Movies - Musicals

I know that several of my boyfriends like musicals (NO!  REALLY?).  Several of these movies have some great lines that really make you think.

So comment away - which have you seen/not seen, liked/hated, good/bad memories, acting, singing, etc.  I am interested in your thoughts.

(in no particular order, with my comments following)

bye bye birdie - so dated; paul lynde's deadpan lines; bobby rydel (philly boy!)

the wizard of oz - "a heart is not judged by how much you love, but how much you are loved by others"

west side story - hatred kills

my fair lady - "c'mon dover, move your bloomin' arse!"; cecil beaton's costumes

funny girl - babs; "hello gorgeous"; what's NOT to like?

singing in the rain - "it says so...right there"

an american in paris - oscar levant's deadpan lines; gene kelly's dancing (pennsylvania boy!)

yellow submarine - blue meanies!  glove!  jeremy!

help - the music, of course!

a hard day's night - "it's a plot...a plot"; the music, of course!

saturday night fever - "you should be dancing" scene (would that I could dance like that!)

head - for a fucked up drugged out time, call jack nicholson!

let it be - lots of drama, tension, fun, hatred, music all rolled into one movie

the music man - ronny howard; shirley jones (pennsylvania girl!); "pile up enough tomorrows and you'll find you've collected nothing but a lot of empty yesterdays"

dirty dancing - PATRICK SWAYZE! (take me now); "nobody puts baby in a corner"; would that I could dance like that!

Did I miss anything? I'm SURE you'll let me know!  Smooches! :)

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Save the Dates - March 22-24, 2013!

Get ready, all my Delaware boyfriends: I'mma cumming (and going) down in Lewes at The Inn at Canal Square (hotel info here) on the dates above (President's Day Weekend).

People like the cajun and ron and mark (and his friends), hell even cubby could make this a party to remember!

And I shan't be alone; the one and only todd (the spouse) is cumming along for the ride too!

So pencil the dates on your calendars, type them on your cellphones, ink them on your palms, tattoo them on your tummy, and cancel all your previous engagements cause we gonna rip rehoboth right round!

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Brain Puke III

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain.  Let's capture some of it here.


Went to a wedding yesterday (spouse's second cousin).  Good food, good company, but fucking tiny cosmos!  I would have needed 20 just to generate a good buzz!  But I lifted my single drink (I was driving) to all my boyfriends everywhere!

As I predicted, my baseball season is over; I am now hibernating til 2/12/13 (pitchers and catchers [HA!] report to Clearwater FL).

It's turning colder this week; the trees are also turning red and yellow and orange.  Grass needs another mowing though...

I turned the heat on at home last evening; damp and chilly + asthma = bad recipe.

I am still voting for Barack Obama because he loves Big Bird.  And he doesn't think that I, part of the 47%, am dirt under his feet.

Why do I look so fabulous at 58, whilst others in my age bracket look 70 or more?

I finally found a brand of Greek yogurt I like!

I lost 5 pounds last month!

There is a pork roast in the slow cooker right now; it's been braising since 7a in teriyake sauce.  My house smells fantastic!

Next on the agenda - make a loaf of beer bread to go with said pork roast for dinner.  Wine is already chilling in the fridge.

Spouse and I have the week off from work this week.  Unfortunately, we can't afford to go anywhere; $3900 for chimney repairs and $1500 in car repairs ate our travel budget.  BUT the house and cars are in great shape for winter!

There seem to be fewer grocery coupons out there for me to use.  But then again, I tend to buy store/generic brands whenever possible.

I need a haircut.

I'm going to call my trash disposal company to see if they will give me a second recycle container on wheels.  I fill up the container I already have way too soon; I need more space for my green initiatives, dammit!  In my 'hood, trash/recycling is picked up on Tuesdays.  ETA: I can have another recycle container for $5/month more.  WOO HOO!

"Wooking par nub, in all de wong pwaces..."

We have a white squirrel on our property, a mutant, an albino.  I rejoice in his difference!

The birds have left for the winter already; no morning songs to greet me.

Have you seen the video "Gangnam Style"?  Korean rapper PSY is the artist.  According to my company's Korean sales rep, Gangnam is a rich town, much like our Beverly Hills; full of phony poseurs and fronters.  Hey, Mittens - could this be your campaign theme song?

I still haven't finished reading the Sunday newspaper yet; however, I DID start a load of laundry!

Have a good week, boyfriends!

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!




This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"What Is Love" - who the hell knows; every person has to decide that for him/herself.

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Friday Happy Hours

So Friday I took a half-day off work to go downtown to see these handsome bears.



The bear on the left is Shawn from San Diego.  He comments on our blogs, but does not have a blog of his own (quelle dommage).  He bought me 3 Grey Goose cosmos (!).

The bear on the right is Raymond, a friend of Shawn's AND Sassybear AND Blair (and dog knows who else).  Raymond is from Washington DC.

A good time was had by all; we drank and talked and laughed and drank and ate and talked and drank.

Let me tell all y'all I was feeling no pain by 7p.  The bears walked me across the street to my commuter rail station and then they took off for Independence Hall 6 blocks east.

Today they headed home to their respective husbands and furkids.

Thanks, Shawn and Raymond, for a VERY fun afternoon!  Beats slogging away at the office any time!  Let's do it again!

(Jealous countdown by my boyfriends in 3...2...1...)

So that my spouse did not feel left out, I brought home an 8" x 8" pineapple cheesecake from the famous and fabulous Termini's.

Saturday Night Dance Party!









This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"I'm Gonna Get You" - you know it!  Some hawt dudes in this video too!

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Brain Puke II

Lots o shit swirling around in the toilet bowl that is my brain.  Let's capture some of it here.

Mittens Romney - please, for the love of all that's holy, STFU RIGHT NOW!

I have had the house windows open for 2 weeks now and it feels great!  No air conditioner running, no heat on, electric/gas savings galore!

Why do people assume women like children?  I don't; I cannot stand the little bastards!

I have the nicest buncha boyfriends a girl could EVAH want!

I am retaining water like a mofo today.  UGH!

I think my baseball season will not last past October 1.  Dammit!

I think the next house project may be a new roof.

First day of autumn; my fave season; my sedum and crape myrtle are still blooming and spouse is still getting tomatoes and peppers.

Fall allergies are killing my eyes and nose!

I have met these guys and these guys this year; on Friday, I get to meet this guy!  He's in my hometown for a meeting, and has promised to buy me a drinky-poo.  Incriminating evidence to follow.

Spouse's new battery-operated lawn mower is so damn quiet, I can hardly hear it running!

Why do some women still act like they are in high school?  Grow up already; as Prince sang, "Act your age, not your shoe size!"

Why the hell is fish so expensive?

I had a coconut pineapple banana smoothie for lunch today; it was missing some rum...

Why do guys like to bang the weights down and grunt loudly when they finish a rep at the gym?  Not only is it bad form, but who are they trying to impress?

Justin Bieber can go to hell.

Kim Kardashian's moment of fame was up 20 years ago.

Paris Hilton, you are so DEAD to the gay community.

The Chick-Fil-A-Hole CEO says nothing has changed in regards to his giving to hate groups.  And nothing has changed in regards to my eating there either.  Suck it, Dan Cathy!

A new hospital opened up in my neighborhood today; I hope I don't have to see the inside of it for a VERY long time.

I detest the sound of leaf blowers.

Some stores have Halloween, Thanksgiving, AND winter holiday shit displays in their windows.  Kill me now.

I am also hearing commercials on spouse's fave radio station for a winter holiday concert.  Kill me again.

Why did spouse just get mail addressed to his nephew's parents?  They live three hours from here...

I have to go to a wedding in two weeks; one of spouse's cousins is getting married.  I don't really care.  I don't know these people and I hate making small talk.

My driveway is covered in brown crunchy oak tree leaves.  And acorns.

The wind chimes outside my kitchen door are making nice music in the breeze today.

I wish my boss were still giving us 1/2 day Fridays.

I wish Mondays did not exist.  PERIOD.

Saturday Night Dance Party!

 



This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Dancing With Myself" - haven't we ALL done this?  :-)

Sunday, September 16, 2012

The Lost Weekend

So Friday I went from Philly to DC to see these guys.

Here's what they look like, in case you have forgotten, or have been living under a rock or something:



After they picked me up at a local metro station (see Blobby, we know the correct term), we went out for lunch, then came back and crashed at their apartment for several hours.  We had Chinese food for dinner.  Cubby made a pound cake all by himself (using my recipe):


and we topped it with fresh strawberries for dessert.  We also consumed cosmos and watched "Polyester"; OMFG, the acting (if you can call it that), the storyline, the "scratch-n-sniff" card - campy fun!  RIP, Divine!  It was late in the evening when they drove me to my hotel (aka the sooper seekret bunker).

Saturday - off to the gayborhood!  (sings it's a beautiful day in the gayborhood, a beautiful day for a gaybor...).  Brunch and bookstores and embassy architecture perusing.  There may or may not have been some gawking at hawt menz.  Unfortunately, I didn't see anything I liked.  Then a trip on the metro to Eastern Market, a combo farmers/flea market and bazaar.  Greg purchased some handmade peppermint soap.  Cubby decided he would cook dinner for us, so off to the supermarket and liquor store before returning to their apartment.  Cubby has the incriminating evidence of how drunk we were on cosmos.  Greg, bless his heart, remained sober so that he could drive me back to the bunker.  Oh yeah, and we drunk-called Kelly and Sassybear.

Today was go home day for me, so I bought the boys a good breakfast.  They accompanied me to the Amtrak train station, then left me to the wolves to go exploring the monuments (Jefferson, Lincoln, FDR, MLK).

I had a wonderful time with Cubby and Greg!  Thank for the memories!  Smooches!

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Saturday Night Dance Party!

   



This is how I am feeling right now.

Dance like no one's watching.

Sing like no one's listening.

"Born To Be Alive" - you know it!

Currently in a sooper seekret bunker location in washington dc visiting this dude and his sexay hubby.  RAWR!